My Journey, My Story by Tipiziwin Tolman
To Whom It May Concern:
My name is Tipiziwin Tolman. I am an enrolled citizen of the Standing Rock Sioux Tribe. I currently reside in Uniontown, Washington with my family.
I am the youngest daughter of Phyllis & Pepper Young, the granddaughter of Mary Yellow Lodge Young Bailey & Gabriel Young, Sr., & Josephine Pretends Eagle & David Half Skunk.
I am writing to the Standing Rock Sioux Tribal Council as well as the Standing Rock Sioux Tribe Language and Culture Department to inform you of what happened to me at the National Indian Education Conference (NIEA) in Albuquerque, New Mexico on October 20, 2023. I was on a panel with three other tribal language teachers: Sisoka Duta (Sisseton-Wahpeton Dakota), Alex FireThunder (Oglala Lakota), and Damien Webster (Seneca), who teach their languages within their respective communities.
I want it to be clear that at NIEA I was on a panel we were NOT representing any organization, tribal entity, or school. NIEA told us they did not want LLC affiliation and we were not allowed to even say we were on the board or Alex was not allowed to say he was an employee.
The premise of our panel was to share our personal language learning journey and focused on these points:
1. Sharing our families’ language stories, where the natural language transmission stopped, who were the latest fluent speakers in our lineages; and,
2. The efforts we took to bring language back into our lives; and,
3. The hopes we have and our future projects/endeavors.
We were not representing any organization, tribal entity, or school. We were there as individuals who have learned our native languages and now teach and advocate for the language in our communities and homes.
Our panel was held in one of the conference rooms at the Albuquerque Convention Center and was filled to capacity at around 50 participants who were tribal educators, administrators and community members from all over the US.
In my presentation, I used a picture of Dakota and Lakota elders that I learned from and have worked with over the past 15-20 years. My aunty Florestine Grant, whom I am sitting next to in the picture was a mentor who attended language classes and programming with me and others for two years, and Unci Delores Taken Alive, and Shirley & Levi Left Hand, regal elders who showed up to support, learn and encourage, were also in the image.
When I prepared this presentation it was to share components that were and are central to our personal learning journey. This picture depicts this reality, and the grandmothers, and aunties included in it, were precious and central figures, not only to me, but to many of us who were active participants in the language learning journey we were all in together at that time. In our Lakota Dakota cultural protocol, it is respectful to cite where we received our teachings and ways of life that we carry, for example, if we know a song, we first say where we learned the song, and in including the picture as a homage to them, I am following the teachings of our ancestors.
While I was presenting, Ray Taken Alive started hollering repeatedly, “That’s my grandma! That’s my grandma!,” while raising and waving his hand and moving towards me in a menacing, aggressive and threatening manner. He continued to holler while two elders tried to hold him back from what appeared as his intent to physically assault me and my co-presenters. NIEA security and the deputy director of NIEA attempted to stop him and ask him to leave. He refused to leave. As the deputy director of NIEA, two security officers and the two elders stood between him, my colleagues and myself, he then moved to the middle of the room, Mr. Taken Alive continued to attempt to come towards me and my co-presenters, in a menacing and aggressive manner, then stood in the center of the room. He took off his back pack as though he was preparing to assault me and my co-presenters. He continuously interrupted the panel while our Seneca colleague continued on with his segment of the presentation.
Mr. Taken Alive demanded an apology from me for using a picture of elders that his grandmother was in. He said “Once she stops her presentation, publicly apologizes to me and deletes the picture, only then will I leave.” This was relayed to me via the deputy director of NIEA, I would not comply as I did not travel to not complete the presentation I prepared and I would not negotiate with those who threaten me physically - even as a female and I am aware he is a much larger and taller male than me, I know without a doubt I could not physically defend myself against him but yet I would not be bullied or threatened into changing my presentation on the spot, as it it is a clear representation of the work that I do, all which is rooted in absolute respect and love for our language and our people, past, present and future.
The picture in question is one that has been used in language revitalization social media and presentations by the Standing Rock Sioux Tribe and Sitting Bull College. Additionally, in the past when myself and Mr. Taken Alive were social media friends, I shared it more than once without objection from him. I shared it during my presentation with no malice or ill intent.
Which is very much the opposite of the time when Mr. Taken Alive, who is a teacher, took a picture of my child (who was still a minor in high school at the time) and myself while we were sitting in a Standing Rock Sioux Tribal council meeting. He captioned it with false information, which led to his social media followers questioning and harassing others in the picture as well as myself. I sat and watched Mr. Taken Alive take our picture. This individual has a picture of my child on his phone.
This same child of mine was relentlessly bullied while attending Fort Yates Middle School. Councilman Cyril Archambault, then an employee of the middle school, supported and protected my son. During that time, Mrs. Lisa Taken Alive, the vice-principal at Fort Yates Middle School, also Ray Taken Alive’s wife, supported my son and made great efforts to keep him safe. So, it was a great disappointment and an egregious act for Ray Taken Alive, as a relative to those who protected my same son, and as a teacher in one of our communities, to take my son’s picture without his or my consent in the Standing Rock Sioux Tribal Council chambers.
After all the precautions we took in our lives to ensure that my children were safe from bullies, here we were getting our picture taken and getting cyberbullied by teachers and fellow community members. After this occurred, I blocked Ray and Lisa from my social media accounts as I did not believe that my children or myself were safe from his attempts to dox me, or to encourage his online followers to harass me, simply because I do not align my professional or personal beliefs with his.
This man continues to bully and terrorize those who do not align themselves with his agenda, and he has been quite successful in doing so, especially among his following online, those who have information gaps, those who just like drama, those who are so loyal to him, they could find out he is a serial killer and they would still stand beside him, and those who do not have decades of lived experience within the Standing Rock language learning community, as I do.
Standing Rock is my home, despite that I do not currently live there as I moved to further my education and have been in higher education consistently at Washington State University and University of Victoria, since I moved in 2017.
Back to the picture that I included in my presentation at NIEA: I included it because it depicts a segment of time that was precious, pivotal and central in my personal language learning journey. At NIEA, after his outburst, this individual stayed in the middle of the room with security having to stand between myself and my co-presenters for the duration of the presentation. For over an hour he stood in the center of the room. We were informed after the completion of our presentation that law enforcement had been notified and were on their way to remove him but they were too late.
We finished our presentation despite these circumstances. I was honored to share my journey with the many participants who came to hear our panel. I continued on because of my commitment to share. I do not negotiate with bullies nor those who threaten me physically. He is much larger and taller than me, but I would still defend myself against him and I finished our presentation despite his aggressive presence as he stood in the middle of the room for the remainder of the whole presentation.
After the panel presentation was over several tribal women came up to me and offered support. One was a Dine woman/healer who prayed with me in Dine and told me, “I will protect you from that man, I am a protector of women, I will protect you.” Another Tewa tribal woman came and stood between me and the individual and others, and told me, “I will stand here and support you. It was very disrespectful for this man to do this and it was very disrespectful for NIEA to allow this to happen.” I am grateful for the protection provided by these women, but why should I have to be protected from MEN from my own tribe, while sharing my heart’s work and my personal experiences regarding our Lakota and Dakota language in an educational and professional setting. I should not have to live in fear of his cyberbullying, cyberstalking and now, how it has led to real life violence-- where law enforcement were called to protect me from him. This man has continued to cyberstalk and cyberbully me over the past three years without repercussions or consequences, from anybody, despite my blocking him from social media. Despite my commitment to never to respond to his baiting, he continues to make videos of me and posts about me. I was failed by the NIEA, our panel was failed by NIEA by allowing this man to threaten us in this manner.
This was a disservice to the many participants who paid and came from all over the US to hear our panel. Some participants who came up to us afterward to share their support and encouragement stated the exact same thing. This should not have been allowed to happen. I am not attempting to sway anyone on council who may have tribal, clan, community, basketball, or familial loyalty to him.
I am writing to ensure that there is a transparent, legal trail.
This includes informing the Standing Rock Sioux Tribal Council and Administration because there is a duty to protect their citizens, their students, their people (and their reputation - should they want to).
I want to make sure that everyone is aware of the absolute unprofessional conduct and lack of educational and tribal standards demonstrated by an individual that the Standing Rock Sioux Tribal Council consistently supports in a public manner, officially and personally.
I have two videos I was able to take while this was happening, they do not encapsulate the entirety of the incident - they are only over one minute in length, as he stood there for over an hour.
If you would like to see the videos, please email me a share request or message me via social media. - they are too large to fit into an email file.
If any one of you would like to communicate, follow up with additional questions or comments, please do not hesitate to contact me.
Best regards,
Tipiziwin Tolman
Tipiziwin@gmail.com