Thoughts on Reconnecting by Jimmy Lee Beason II, Osage

To some degree we are all reconnecting to our Native value systems, no matter what tribal community we come from and will experience a lifelong journey of re-discovery, unless you were raised traditionally since you were a baby then your connection will be much stronger. In that case the challenge becomes maintaining that connection to your traditional worldview within this Euro-Christian American society that incessantly seeks to pull you away from those values through the inundation and influences of materialism, individualism, narcissism, and mindless consumerism.

Having a connection to your people and, more specifically, to a unique tribal community is paramount and a very important aspect of life for us as Native people. Our culture, traditions, spirituality, and ceremony provide us with a moral compass to navigate the perils of life. Without it, we are adrift and are vulnerable to teachings and ideologies that can be harmful. Due to colonization and the genocidal policies of the U.S., many of us have been disconnected and are seeking out that which was taken. So, building that connection is very important and I just wanted to share little bit of insight based on my own experiences for those who consider themselves “reconnecting”.

This writing does not cover all the nuance that goes into reconnecting, and I don’t claim to have all the answers. This will also not pertain to every Native or community, as I am an Osage with Seminole, Muscogee and UKB Cherokee blood, who grew up in Oklahoma and El Paso, TX, currently living in Lawrence, KS.

Also, my grandma was a Scots Irish princess, but I can’t prove it….

Anyways, when it comes to physically going into a community you are unfamiliar with, even though they are your people, it can be somewhat intimidating, and you may feel self-conscious. This is why you need to find out who your relatives are be they grandmas, grandpas, aunts, uncles, and cousins. For me, I grew up around my grandparents and they helped raise me. My grandma spoke fluent Seminole to other Seminoles and Creeks and called it “talkin’ Indian.” She was the one who introduced me to other relatives and community members.

Anytime we went somewhere like a grocery store, she would point and whisper, “see that lady right there? That’s your cousin…” She would drawl out the cousin in a hushed tone with a grin. My grandpa, who was Osage, told me who our relatives were and where they lived. So, this is why it is important to establish who your relatives are as they may help you understand the people you come from.

I have seen conversations on social media where some become offended at being asked who their people are, and I find this reaction very odd. Asking about your family is how kinship is established as we just might be related! Or we have the same grandma from way back! To me, this seems like one is embarrassed because they don’t know (which if you are “reconnecting” then you may not know), or they are a pretendian. Either way, it comes off as very suspicious and can be insulting. Instead, just be upfront and honest with who you are.

Also, in this world of instant gratification, we can become entitled and impatient. This kind of attitude can seep into other aspects of our lives, such as learning your culture. My experience has been, to just watch and listen and if the people you learn from are sincere and you are sincere, it will work out. You also have to ask yourself, are you reconnecting to see what you can take or to see what you can give? In this society, we have been conditioned to be rather self-centered and do things in order to fulfill this individualistic idea of self-fulfillment.

To an extent it is natural to want some kind of validation, that what you are doing is correct. However, as you move along you begin to realize reconnecting is more about, we rather than me. That means helping, assisting, and lending a hand. If there is a ceremony, ask what you can do to help out. Are they cooking? Clean up afterwards. Going to a sweat lodge? Ask if they need someone to carry the rocks. If wood is needed, offer to haul, and split it. Again, these are just some examples of building that connection that I have observed and experienced in my life and there may be other situations that present themselves differently. There are many times when I was at a ceremony or community event and just stood there watching everyone work with a goofy look on my face. Don’t be that guy!

Overall, I want to end this with a small word of caution. Be careful when reconnecting as there are many spiritual hustlers and culture pimps out there who want to take advantage of those yearning for answers. They may know just enough to sound legit. But if someone demands money or starts making strange requests in exchange for “knowledge” and “guidance” you may need to walk the other way. For this, I speak from experience as I have come across individuals like this and it is not a good feeling! I do not say this to frighten anyone from reconnecting or trying to be more involved. The key concept here is reconnecting takes time and work and it is a long path with various challenges that are unique to our generation, things our ancestors didn’t have to deal with. Hopefully, we can be those ancestors for future generations who reignited the spark for the fire they will warm themselves by.

By Jimmy Lee Beason II

Jimmy is from the Osage Nation, as well as Seminole and UKB Cherokee. He is an author, poet, fiction writer and professor at HINU. You can follow Jimmy on Instagram @osage_native_scholar or email him directly at pahuska8@gmail.com