"The list" by Johnnie Jae

I haven't really had the energy to address "the list" and to be honest, I have a very flippant attitude towards lists because it's all colonial bullshit, don't get me wrong. Lists no matter how benign have repercussions that lead to putting people in danger of real harm.

My Uncle Mike used to tell me "Baby Jae, We're Native. We/You were born on watchlists." It's not a threat that works on me but I have absolutely been put in danger because of lists & people concerned about "the list" should 100% be worried & angry.

There are lists we consent to creating & signing up for, lists that we were forced to create, be on & forced off. Lists that we are put on to be set apart, watched and targeted. No one in NDN country consented to lists, our hands were forced. Some relented & others rebelled.

Isn't funny how white supremacy has convinced us that lists are necessary....Natives are put on lists at birth, we are given certificates of degree of Indian Blood which for some tribes is all that is required for us to be put on another list called tribal enrollment.

Then there are tribes who require more than a CDIB, they require a certain degree of Indian Blood called Blood Quantum, which is funny since neither CDIBs or Blood Quantum have anything to do with our blood or any scientific measure of how much and what kind of "Indian" we are.

Blood Quantum was designed as a method of breeding Natives out of existence, a paper genocide. I don't know who needs to hear this but you can't fuck Natives out of existence. The penis that penetrates us and the womb that births us cannot water down or erase our indigeneity.

We are and we always will be.

But still lists persists and so do the methods of making sure that people who are eligible or on the lists can be removed to hurry the goal of complete extermination. But all this is just for Nations put on lists known as Federal Recognition or State Recognition. There's also a list of the Tribal Nations that rebelled & refused to be put on a list and there's a list of tribes denied recognition and list of hobbyist groups known as fake tribes.

And now a list of Pretendians or fake Indians.

Lists are fucking exhausting, especially this one because it isn't born out of a desire to protect our identities. It's born out of a desire to divide and inflict hurt upon individuals for not looking or seeming Indian enough. For not being known enough or being too known, for not being connected or connected enough....for just not being enough or being too much by the creators' standards, not by their communities or even by individual tribal nation's standards of belonging and self-determination.

Because there are enrolled Natives, Natives who are accepted and a part of the every day doings of their community on that list, there are Natives not enrolled, who had their connections severed by adoption, foster care. There are Natives who belong to "unrecognized" nations. And there are pretendians on that lists...which is the most nefarious thing because they aren't on that list to be outed as Pretendians since we know who the pretendians are..we meme them, call them out and make fun at every chance.

They are there to cast doubt about the Natives on the list, to validate the attacks because people outside of NDN country, don't know any better. They'll see the obvious fakes like Depp & Warren & assume everyone is a fake as well not knowing or thinking to look further. There are also Natives who don't know any better because of titles being thrown around and because they don't know the Natives personally and because let's face it...we have Natives that just love gossip and drama because they are bored and like to stir the pot.

No one is denying that pretendianism is a problem and I honestly feel given the rise in Native popularity and representation, a list was inevitable because any time power, wealth, privilege and visibility are involved, so are lists. Because of course there are folks who want to take control and vet who they feel is worthy or unworthy of having any of the above and they want the power to take it away. These same people are the ones who don't want to dismantle oppression but wield the power of the oppressor.

That's what is going on here. To the Natives on that lists, I am sorry because you deserve better and I am proud of you for the grace you show, for your commitment to the betterment of NDN country. For those speaking out in solidarity, for calling out the blantant anti-Blackness and refusing to be silent....I am proud of you too because this behavior and harm isn't new. So many don't speak out because of the relentless viciousness. And for those not speaking out because of that very reason, I have your back too.

I would also like to add that none of us are above criticism or being held accountable for our actions. There were a few Natives on that list that I know also exhibit some of the same gatekeeping behavior going on with the list but still doesn't invalidate their indentity. Being on that list shouldn't give them a pass from all other criticism....it just means they shouldn't be having their identity scrutinized because of it.

We should all be angry about what's going on here because lists create targets and people being added to any list without warning or consent is dangerous especially given that Native people are already targeted for violence because folks know they can get away with it.

Blindsiding people, releasing information about their families without consent is a gross violation of human decency and our kinship as Native people because you can't control what others will do with that information when they see it as an open invitation into those folks lives, especially when you lack consent and weren't invited in the first place. When they see it as an open invitation for violence under the guise of protecting Indigenous Identity.

It may not be the intent but intent does not negate the impact and in this case it's the livelihood and lives of Native people being put at stake....not pretendians. Cher and Vanilla Ice aren't losing any sleep nor care about this list.

Hold folks accountable but don't lose sight of the bigger problem which is how some of the greatest threats we face to our sovereignty & existence are coming from within not outside NDN Country because of how integrated white supremacy & colonialism has become over generations. Decolonization isn't just a buzzword, it's a battleground and we need to be on the frontlines or else we become the final weapon deployed to destroy ourselves completely.

By Johnnie Jae

Johnnie Jae is an Otoe-Missouria and Choctaw journalist, speaker, podcaster, technologist, advocate, community builder and entrepreneur that loves empowering others to follow their passions and create for healing and positive change in the world. She is the founder of A Tribe Called Geek, an award-winning media platform for Indigenous Geek Culture and STEM as well as #Indigenerds4Hope, a suicide prevention initiative designed to educate, encourage and empower Native Youth who are or know someone struggling with bullying, mental illness and suicide.