I dropped my project “yamni” this month, about a polyamorous relationship with 3 bisexual Lakota women, independent, during a global pandemic... Eeeee by JUQ
Here I am, Wanbli Ceya aka JUQ... You may know me, have heard about me or you Neither. On the last day of Native American Heritage Month, I’m writing to you a short message in regards to my latest project “yamni”, that of which if anyone out there has been following heavily or if they haven’t, is the 3rd chapter of my story “the oglala wolf puppy w/ PTSD”, a story that began with my project “tempo” (2016) & the follow up “nya” (2019), which the latter dropped one year ago right before the pandemic broke out... It is now the following year where I’ve made progress but what feels none at the same time... I’m in my own space which works and have managed to scrape by this year, with more tea, sage preferably. I’m aware of what’s happening, much change is coming. Vaccines are coming after a traumatic year with Covid-19, Many lives lost especially elders, those that were probably the only reason I gained the courage to speak what I saw. Crazy natural disasters, riots for systemic change on a global level, a new president elect that the truth really is... If we stop at all, nothing will change for the better. I knew I was going to drop this November 6th before I turned 26 which happened on 8th, I was just scared of the reaction like I’ve been conditioned to be scared of my whole life, especially with the intensity of what was going on. That’s the nature of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, what happens to you when you’re young (and sometimes what physically doesn’t) can leave a lasting effect that alters everything, but nothing at the same time. Cause if you remain true, you never really lose you.
Contrary to how I might “joke” about this album or however this might not be appropriate. This isn’t about an “orgy” or some sort of sexual fantasy, which none of that is truly problematic if with consenting adults. It is a proponent of the thing that has eluded our people time and time again, Consent. I was always aware of what was happening to our Lakota women, the indigenous woman in America and all over Unci Maka. Many of our women have internalized so much pain due to the ramifications of what America and other imperialistic empires did to indigenous people everywhere. With the social experiences to have come about up until this point, our women had been pressured to be so many things they weren’t just to fit in, falling into habits that were born due to the need to feel loved and be protected to the degree as they used to be. But with rampant problems such as abuse of many forms, misogyny that of which has trickled down into our men from white men, and a myriad of problems plaguing a society that surrounds our experiences on and off reservation. When are our women truly safe? This shouldn’t be a shocker, some may disagree. It is with our men, but only when they are themselves. I believe wholeheartedly that comes through telling the truth, accountability, full frontal realness in addressing the things you’ve experienced as a Lakota / indigenous man growing up till now. Recounting Traumas, things taught from Ina (mother), Ate (Father), Unci (Grandmother), Gaka (Grandpa), White man world, good or bad, etc. Various unhealthy coping mechanisms learned from said experiences (hypersexuality being a big one no one ever talks about). Then when you’ve reconciled these dilemmas, you can just say what you feel to them. That’s what I did, unsuccessfully numerous times but that’s what I’ve been doing. From “tempo” & “nya” to “yamni”, I was speaking to our women first and foremost about what I was dealing with, the hope that I would be able to come to an understanding, that I could reach one somehow regardless of how foggy things felt. That I just wanted love that didn’t have limits, or expectations, or pressures I couldn’t find myself feeling comfortable with. That simply because I didn’t see myself with just one girl or guy, didn’t negate the feelings for everyone I was in love with, especially our women. Y’all my babies, and at any given point you realize this isn’t for you, that I’m not for you.
“It’s ok, I understand” ...
This is in essence is what Polyamory looks like from the perspective of me, an Oglala koskolaka (young man) trying his best to just be, to reclaim what was robbed from me before I was even born, and even after. My freedom.
This year has been the year to solely reflect on everything, I’ve been trying my best to understand my place amongst my people while simultaneously teaching myself to deal with what’s to come and I know everyone is feeling it. If I could ask everyone that choose to take the time. I want you to listen to this whole project and go back and listen to “tempo”, “nya”, listen to everything. Read the lyrics. I laugh, I cringe (harder than you’d imagine... lmao), I cry for what feels like days on end, I smile due to the feeling of just letting it all out every time, And I wocekiya, cry out and pray, so hard that people who receive this in a way that is healing, that is helpful, no matter how raunchy, startling, or whatever descriptor fits my artistry. So that our people are not afraid to have fun the way we used to. To dance like only the people you love and would die for are watching with pure eyes. To live like you found the love or loves of your life for the rest of it. I think 1 of them has to be you. And No matter how hard or painful that process is, to get to the real you. It’s worth it. Every. Single. Time. There’s more to this story, the next chapter is about Axel... a guy. I just that all of you are finding your way through all this. You’re in my prayers and I hope I’m in yours. Much love oyatekin and mitakuyepi. <3
Listen to “yamni” and all my music at the following links:
Itunes / Apple Music: https://music.apple.com/us/album/yamni/1539175725
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/album/7gyR7jRwGoHA6zHW0Mavzv
Bandcamp: https://juq9.bandcamp.com/album/yamni
Socials:
Facebook: “Wanbli Ceya” - personal, “JUQ” - like page
Instagram: @WanbliCeya9
Tik Tok: @WanbliCeya
http://www.youtube.com/user/jqjy
http://www.soundcloud.com/wanbliceya
If you would like to donate to help me continue artistry, as a singer / songwriter based on the pine ridge Reservation, any amount would be a dream come true. <3:
CashApp: @WanbliCeya
Paypal: wanbliceya@outlook.com